ain't no Houellebecq girl (yiskah) wrote,
ain't no Houellebecq girl

Stopping now.

Oh, this week's all been a bit silly really. I was at least sensible and went home on Friday night, but then yesterday was yum cha with chiller and bucuo, which seemed to stretch into the afternoon; then Paul called - he's about to go to South Africa for six months and was having a leaving thing. Right, said I to chiller, they're out in Angel now, it's only half five so I'll go and meet them for a quick drink and then come home before dinner. Excellent. So I headed to Angel and found Paul and Dave in a pub, and had a couple of beers, and time seemed to go very fast and Paul said that the restaurant was good and cheap, so OK, I thought, I'll go for the meal but go home straight after. But then there was bottle after bottle of Chilean merlot, and suddenly we were in a pub somewhere in North London, and then another pub, and I was smoking (I never smoke! Because it is horrible!) and then a taxi, and then in the Funky Monkey in Camberwell, doing some sort of terrifying salsa dancing with a West African called Boh. Brilliant! Then Paul and everyone else left and finally I was poured into a taxi around 3am. For fuck's sake. Am so easily persuadable; it was a great night but hello, I am poor, I am 28 and too old for such shenanigans more than once in a while, and most importantly I am trying to do a PhD and write a novel and cannot afford to write off whole days because I am too hungover to cope. Furthermore, alcohol is after all a depressant, and while I am roughly a frillion times better than I was a few weeks ago, drinking does occasionally bring out some sort of raging angst and insecurity.

Anyway. Woke up this morning, the world was tilted on its axis, my lungs felt like they'd been filled with concrete (smoking! Just say no!) and I was somewhat limp with self-loathing. Dragged self out of bed, was plied with yogi tea, and forced myself to go for a run (first exercise since I got back from Sudan! Was surprisingly easy), which made me feel better in body but inexplicably bleak in spirit. But we went to the caff, which helped, as did a blow by blow description of a documentary about honey badgers, delivered through the magic of text messages, and by mid afternoon I was buoyant again. Still have not done any of the things I was going to do today (aside from the running) but the evening is stretching out before me all empty, and I WILL be productive, I WILL.

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?
Jesus fucking Christ.

2. How much cash do you have on you?
A fiver, and assorted coins of various currencies.

3. What's a word that rhymes with "DOOR"?
More. (That, right there, probably explains the root of all my problems.)

4. Favorite planet?
Uranus! Haaaa.

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?
I've only been using this phone since Tuesday, so I only have two missed calls - one from Paul, and one from Judith.

6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?
I have absolutely no opinion on this. Anything but the Nokia tune, I suppose.

7. What shirt are you wearing?
I'm not wearing a shirt, I'm wearing a green and blue 50s-print flowery dress. Over jeans. My Thin Person jeans!

8. Do you "label" yourself?
Atheist, feminist, non-specific leftist. That's about it. Someone asked me recently if I'd been a crusty (as I mentioned owning an Ozric Tentacles album); "no," I said, "I've never really been an anything." I'm useless at that sort of thing; I don't know how to do it.

9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing?
They're uggs, but I'm not sure if they're official actual uggs or knock-off uggs as they were only $50 (Australian) from a market in Melbourne. Shut up, they are warm and purple!

10. Bright or Dark Room?
Depends what I'm doing. Bright for reading, dark for teh sex. Am mildly obsessive about natural light.

11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?
jinxremoving is fabulous, gorgeous, passionate, smart and magnificent, and we are going to CUBA! circumlocute is charming, witty, urbane, beautifully dressed and utterly engaging. They are both deeply impressive women, and I'd be a little intimidated by them both if they weren't both utterly lovely.

12. What does your watch look like?
I have a lovely silver Skagen watch that I don't wear because it's a bit broken and anyway, it tends to make me sad. I also have a fairly ridiculous multiculoured digital watch that hasn't been unpacked yet. Mostly I just use my phone.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?
In a pub in Angel, I think, or possibly a cab heading for Camberwell. Possibly also on the phone to ultraruby!

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?
"Don't worry, I'm just casing the joint for a future attack. Xx"

15. Where is your nearest 7-11?
I have no idea.

16. What's a word that you say a lot?
Fuck and its cognates. Also, 'excellent', apparently.

17. Who told you he/she loved you last?
chiller, in a platonic way. Non-platonically, it's been a while. Whatever.

18. Last furry thing you touched?
Um. Possibly the giant poodle in the pub last night.

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days?
Lots of booze, and some fags. No no no!

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?
None, I don't think, unless there's a half-used one in my SLR.

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
Second half of 26 up till now. It's been tough, often, but I've never felt so grounded.

22. Your worst enemy?
I don't have enemies, though the ex-boyfriend of a friend, and the mother of an ex-boyfriend of mine still stir up surprising amounts of rage.

23. What is your current desktop picture?
On my own laptop, it's a picture of an autumn leaf floating in one of the Plitvice Lakes in Croatia. One day I really will get round to uploading photos from the Big Trip, honest.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?
Something admiring about the little jacket chiller knitted for her new camera.

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?
Actual ability to fly unaided, not just a pilot's license? That, definitely.

26. Do you like someone?
What, in a fancying way? Yes, as it happens.

27. The last song you listened to?
Something hymn-like coming from the TV.

28. What time of day were you born?

29. What's your favorite number?
Oh, I don't know. I vastly prefer odd numbers to evens, though. I am physically unable to sign off a text, email etc. with an even number of kisses.

30. Where did you live in 1987?
183 Gunnersbury Lane, Acton, West London.

31. Are you jealous of anyone?
No one, really. I'd rather like some more money, and someone to put my arms around once in a while. But I've made my choices.

32. Is anyone jealous of you?
People often say that they're jealous of the book thing, which I can totally understand if they're people who've written novels and wrangled with the publishing industry themselves, because I'm the first to admit that so much of this is down to chance and luck. But I don't understand the jealousy coming from people who haven't done those things. Like, sit down, write a book, spend two years sending it out to agents and having each rejection chip away a little more at your heart, and then tell me you're jealous. No one just showed up at my house with a book deal in hand, you know? I did work for it.

33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?
In Sydney. It was late at night, I found out from the internet and switched on the TV in time to see the second tower fall. My boyfriend at the time was due to fly from DC to London that day or the day after or before or something, which freaked me out a little.

34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Hit them halfheartedly, and say FUCK.

35. Do you consider yourself kind?
Yes, actually.

36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
I quite want some flowers on my back, since I dreamt about having a tattoo like that the first day I was in Sudan. I'm also going to get a shooting rainbow star thing to cover the kanji one above my left hipbone.

37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?
Sudanese Arabic, for obvious reasons. Otherwise, Russian, and I have a real hankering to learn Portuguese, as it is so damn sexy. All in good time.

38. Would you move for the person you loved?
I have done. I said for a while that I'd never do it again, but actually I don't regret doing it, and yeah, I'd probably do it again if necessary. Incurable romantic (and optimist), me.

39. Are you touchy feely?
Only with people I'm sleeping with. Or when I'm drunk.

40. What's your life motto?
Oh, I don't know. Just: do stuff, I guess.

41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?
Keys, wallet, phone.

42. What's your favorite town/city?
London or Sydney. Also, Istanbul.

43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?
Breakfast in the caff.

44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?
I sent a birthday card to my grandma and a cheque to my ex (with a little note) a few weeks ago.

45. Can you change the oil on a car?
Car? Hello, I live in London.

46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?
First crush love: googled him a while back; he was living in Dublin and working for a theatre. First actual boyfriend: married, two kids, living in Japan. First boyfriend I actually loved: living and working in Durham, doing well I think. I hope so.

47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?
One strand goes back to the Norman conquest. With the others, at least a few generations.

48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
Proper, proper fancy? I wore a strapless dress, pleated black lace over pink underskirt thing, and vintage shoes from Dublin, to a friend of a friend's wedding on Cape Cod on New Year's Day. Oh, and chiller and I got drunk and tried on all our fancy frocks a few weeks ago.

49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?
My muscles are pleasantly achy in the Did Exercise way. It's good.

50. Have you been burned by love?
Well, love's a big burny thing, isn't it? It's OK. It gets better.
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